Monday 17th, March 2014
Sunrise
Channel 7
PO Box 777
Pyrmont
NSW 2009
Dear Sam,
Hello. My name’s
Tom. How good are you at beach volleyball? Like, one a scale of one to ten,
with ten being ‘exceptionally good at volleyball’ and one being ‘probably
better suited to a data entry role’.
It probably seems
like a really odd question, but it’s related to a conversation I’m currently
having with your co-host, Dave Koch. See, I asked Dave Koch (I call him Dave,
because we’re on those terms now) who he’d take, out of his co-hosts, if he
were stranded on a desert island. He hasn’t responded yet, obviously because we
need to establish whether or not you’re good at beach volleyball.
See, what it is,
is that he might take the guy who does all the sports stories, but only so he
can play beach volleyball with him to stay fit. I think I saw a movie once
where a guy got to go to a desert island, and all he had was a volley ball, so
I think it’s like a package thing.
Anyway, Dave Koch
would obviously have a lot of spare time on the island, and even though we’ve
agreed that you’re certainly far more pretty than the sports guy, maybe Dave
Koch would prefer somebody who he could pass the time with, once he’s finally
come to terms with the fact that nothing is going to happen between you and
him.
I’ve included a
self-addressed envelope so you’ll be able fill-out the below questionnaire to
return to me, and we can finally put to rest this whole, rotten affair once and
for all.
Warmest regards,
Tom
Question : How good are you at
beach volleyball?
Answer (200-300 words):
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SIGNED:_________________________________
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